A Subject so Loaded, Alec Baldwin Pointed it at Me.

Time to talk about the gays

🌈Pride Goeth Before The Fall🌈

Not enough gay people are saying what we all know is true… The gay rights movement has been commandeered by a bunch of crazy straight people, hell bent on proving the worst slurs of Republicans from the 1990’s accurate. It’s June, Raytheon and Disney have their new, ugly, 2022 pride flags up, so let’s talk about where this has all gone. I think we have made some mistakes… and we need to fix them.

First, a couple of points so you know where I’m coming from:

1. I am a gay man. I have been on the bleeding edge of gay rights for a long time and I support acceptance and equality under the law for every American, including gays, lesbians, and trans people.

2. Speaking of trans people, they seem to come in three categories, these days. The first are old school “trannies”. They call themselves “trannies”. They are hilarious and ridiculous and I know and care about many of them.

3. The second trans category are gay guys who are just super-duper gay. (Sorry ‘bout it, but it’s true)

4. Finally are the “transgenders” or “non-binaries” or whatever they are calling themselves this week. The vast majority of these are homely, straight, white girls who are desperately trying to be interesting while remaining insufferable. In 6 or 7 years, most of them will be married to a lawyer and complaining that the service at their country club is going down hill while the nanny raises their kids.

5. It’s that third category that’s the problem. Nobody elected these glorified fag hags to run the gay rights movement. Someone needs to tell them, “Hey Grace… sit your ass down and shut the hell up. This isn’t about you”.

Hold on to those feathered boas, boys… I’m just getting started.

God save us from acceptance

You might not believe this, but being gay used to be a hell of a lot of fun. Gays used to have a sense of humor and were tough. It was dark and dangerous and somehow light and hilarious at the same time. Young men would connect with their friends on an extremely deep level and because almost all of us were a mess of some kind, we could laugh without judging each other so much. For most of us, it was far less about sex and drugs than you’ve been led to believe… but there was a lot of that too.

There were fat gays and bitchy queens and black gays and gaysians and twinks and bears, oh my!. There were big old harrumphy bull dykes and lipstick lesbians and Sporty Spices and annoying political activists. Trannies and freaks, fishy queens, and scary ones too. Misfits of all kinds and everyone was included… all part of one big dysfunctional family.

I guess I can’t speak for everyone, but back in those days we weren’t looking for the world to celebrate us so much. We were content among each other and being able to be open with one another. Sometimes that meant you were a big closet case (which was me for many years) so that you could go to an elite conservative school and work in a white collar job. Some gays couldn't really pass and knew they would never fit in, so they got their ears pierced and put on that leather bracelet and got a job tending bar or at the neighborhood record store.

That was the world in which the gay rights movement finally came of age. That was my world. Because of AIDS and a million other reasons, more and more gay people came out and lived openly. The rest of society saw that they weren’t all that threatening or scary, and society and the gays cut an unwritten deal, written here for clarity:

You stop treating us like the scum of the earth and recognize that we have the right to live our lives openly and honestly and we will behave like we belong in society. We get one parade a year in each town and promise not to get too crazy… except for Fantasy Fest in Key West, and the Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco, and New Orleans doesn’t count. Also, we want to get married… for some reason.

Straight society pretty much agreed and that was that. It was a good deal and it worked fine for about 10 years.

So what the hell happened? How have things gone so haywire that even Bill Maher has had enough?

The Acronym

The acronym, which I have never really supported, used to be pretty simple. First it was GLT (gays, lesbians, trans). Then the bisexual people wanted in. Most gay people said, “I guess that’s fine”. I remember having debates with other gays about the bisexuals. My point was always “if you are a dude that has sex with dudes, you are a big old gay. Just use the ‘G’… you don’t need your own letter”. I still kind of believe that.

But fine… they wanted in, so it became GLBT for a little while. Then some lesbian got mad and said she wanted the “L” to be first, and because rule #1 of being gay is don’t piss off the lesbians… it got changed to LGBT, and there it remained for a number years.

I believe that history will show those years of LGBT to be the best years for the gays. It was somewhere between about 2007 and 2017. Nobody really cared if someone was gay or lesbian anymore. Even among conservative groups of friends it became fashionable to have at least one gay couple at your cocktail party or dinner group. The stereotype was that they were well to-do, well dressed, well mannered, funny, skinny, attractive guys. Who could possibly object?

Then came the activists. All of a sudden, right after the gay marriage decision, someone stuck a ‘Q’ in the damn acronym. To this day nobody can tell you with any accuracy what the ‘Q’ stands for. It used to be “questioning”… which is decidedly not a sexual orientation, then it became “queer”… which is just a slur for any one of the other letters. At any rate… with the addition of that one little ‘Q’, we went off the cliff. Adding the ‘Q’ included people who are… in fact… not homosexual into the category.

A kid questioning what he or she likes is a normal part of growing up. That doesn’t make them gay or lesbian or trans. A person who feels that they are different is not the same thing as a gay person. That isn’t a value judgement, it’s a statement of undeniable fact.

But what was started couldn’t be stopped. Now the acronym is LGBTQQIP2SAAA, and that doesn’t even cover all of it. Crazy, right? What do all those letters mean?

• LGBT: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans

• QQ: Questioning and Queer (they couldn’t share the same ‘Q’ anymore, don’t ask which one is which)

• I: Intersex - This is a birth defect, not a sexual orientation. Intersex people are not 50/50… they usually have either genetic or physical characteristics that allow them to live as one sex or the other. It’s a medical condition, and an incredibly rare one at that.

• P: Pansexual - The same thing as a bisexual but more annoying about it.

• 2S: 2 Spirit - From what I can tell, this is an Indian with multiple personality disorder.

• A: Asexual - This doesn’t exist. It’s a myth made up by an aging lesbian who lives in a cave.

• A: Androgynous - This describes Eastern European dance music in the 80’s… not a sexual orientation. Just because lots of gays danced to it, doesn’t make it a sexual orientation. 99 Luftballons.

• A: Ally - This is a straight girl with all gay friends… We used to call that a fag hag.

• Batman symbol: Probably coming soon.

I’ve seen longer examples with more letters, but they just get dumber from there. The thing is, this doesn’t represent what the whole movement was about… gay people.

The expanded acronym is nothing more than narcissism and boring people desperately wanting to be part of something they think is cool. Well, that and wanting to claim they are oppressed. Frankly it’s all very annoying.

Soulless corporations suck out all the fun

I think it was June of 2018 when I first saw it. I was at a Toyota engine and transmission manufacturing plant in Buffalo, West Virginia for a work thing, and one of the flagpoles had a rainbow flag flying. I was so thoroughly struck by this that I actually stopped and took a picture of it and sent it to my then boyfriend.

This is the actual picture

I was completely stunned by this. What in the hell was a pride flag doing flying at an engine plant in Buffalo, West Virginia? Part of me was thrilled… for a guy my age, seeing that was nothing short of miraculous. The idea that the UAW members, in this reddest part of the reddest state in America, didn’t pull that thing down and burn it was nothing short of astonishing.

But slowly it dawned on me. The workers didn’t do that, not because they supported gay rights, but because they were afraid of what would happen to them if they said anything. They weren’t celebrating anything, they were being bullied into silence. I understood it then and I understand it now… There’s just no way that doesn’t lead to backlash.

The same is true of the military, and Raytheon, and Disney, and all the other woke corporations that are demanding people bend at the knee to the alter of LGBTQIA+. Not only were we no longer transgressive, we were so main stream that we had become compulsory. Horrifying.

I can’t speak for all gays here, but I can speak for myself: I don’t need Toyota to fly a flag in West Virginia, I just need them to make good cars. I don’t need Coca-Cola to promote a minimum number to BIPOCs to middle management, I just need them to make a good soda pop.

And the reason I say that is because every time those auto workers walk past that flag or every time a qualified straight white guy gets passed over for a promotion he should have had, resentment and anger build in their hearts.

The backlash has already started. I don’t want to be represented by blue haired screaming activists cosplaying gay for a few years until they grow up… because when the time comes to pay the piper, they will have moved past their little phase and I will be left having to answer for what they did.

We cut a deal. We were supposed to be nice and live our lives… In return, we got a parade every year and the right to live our lives without being attacked, maligned, and pushed to the margins of society. It was a good deal… Now people who aren’t gay and weren’t there when the deal got cut are throwing it back in society’s face, and I’m going to have to pay for it. Screw that.

Seriously, get Pride out of corporate America and put it back where it belongs, in a smokey bar in a bad neighborhood with the windows painted over and great music being played a little too loud.

Now the elites are turning kids trans

Probably my least favorite people in the country are the elite, wealthy, white, urban liberals who grab ahold of a cause they don’t really understand, and act like they are marching to Selma with Martin Luther King over it. Nothing exemplifies this more than the near universal embrace, among these types, of “gender ideology”.

Not enough grumpy aging homos are telling the truth about this, so I will:

If you encourage your child to be gay, you are hurting that child. A child is either gay or not (and most of them are not)… I assure you he or she will figure it out on his or her own. You are encouraging this for your own narcissism and you should stop. The only conversation you need to have with a child about sexuality is “God loves you and so do I”. And also, “use a condom and respect your partner”, but that comes later.

As for those parents out there who are transitioning their children to the opposite sex, they are taking part in full on evil. It’s Munchausen by proxy. They are making their child sick so that they can get attention. It’s no different than those evil moms who put antifreeze in their kid’s sippy cup so they can get sympathy for a sickly child on The Facebook. It happens, it’s wrong, and anyone taking part in it should be locked in a padded room.

The “doctors” who provide such a “service” should be dragged before a military tribunal, convicted of crimes against humanity, and fed to hungry Komodo Dragons.

Do. Not. Sexualize. Children. It’s an easy rule, and one we should all follow. Furthermore, stop including the sexualization of children in the gay rights movement. Gay people don’t support it and we aren’t the ones taking part in it. Please and thank you.

Conclusion

I’ve written and rewritten this article a few times. I didn’t know how harsh to be or exactly where the line should be on any of this. Most of my readers are straight, and I don’t want to imply that gay rights aren’t important and that they shouldn’t support them. They are important, and they should be supported.

But I am also frustrated that this civil rights movement, essentially about my tribe, has been coopted by people who just want attention and power. In their zeal, they are doing some very bad things… and they are doing it in my name.

In the end, it’s important for me to be technicolor clear… Whoever they do speak for, they don’t speak for this O.G. ‘G’.

Non Sequitur

Hey, Republican primary voters! You are going to have a pretty good time in November. Could you do us all a teeny-tiny favor?

Maybe don’t nominate stupid and/or crazy people for higher office and f*ck it up for everyone. There’s more to life than “owning the libs”.

Thaaaaaanks!

Happy Saturday all!

—Virgil